hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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