I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
