To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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