Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
