Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
