After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
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The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
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My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.