No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
