Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I looked at my own cervix.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Found your dick twin last night
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
