my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I cut my penus on the lid.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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