You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
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