You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
This girl is more easily done than said...
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Randomize
