Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
