butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Michael Bay diarrhea
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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