I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Randomize
