Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
