The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
