fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
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