i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
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I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
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Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.