well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
one might say we're banned from that church
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
