Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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