and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
