dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
