that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Blood and glitter go together right?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
