exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize