have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
