I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
