I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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