i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
its liver damage thursday
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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