OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I forget how to act sober
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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