But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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