I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
As shirtless as possible
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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