It's like God shit irony all over that family
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
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