I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
