Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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