They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize