you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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