So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
