I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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