I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.