Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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