I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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