i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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