I will die if light touches me.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I'm bleeding and have questions
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