I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
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He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
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Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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