UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
