Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize