Do you still have your period?
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
time to smoke my breakfast
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
