capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Someone came in the potted fern
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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