office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
