I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You ate ashes out of my bong
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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